Monday, August 9, 2010

Can I wear these to bed?

Mom has long ago forgotten the word,"earring", but she is still very concerned about her appearance. Late every afternoon I wake her up, telling her it's "cocktail hour". ( She gets 1 glass of wine and cranberry juice thereafter - but Mom never knows the difference)

Her immediate response,"Cocktails? Oh, good,"What am I going to wear? You'll have to help me..."

That was really an aside, this is tonight's real story.....
Tonight she found a pair of silver earrings on her bedside table. She insisted on trying them on and smiling at herself in the mirror. I told her she would probably like to wear them to dinner tomorrow with her son,"Chuckie, my boy".

( Isn't it something that she still recalls her only son, yet thinks that I am just another caretaker, no relation, even though she lives with me 24/7?)

Then she asked in a sweet childlike voice, "Can I wear these to bed?"

"Sure!." I almost cried. She is still my mother and she is here physically, but someone else has invaded her brain. I know I will miss her terribly when she is gone, yet there are days when I wish I were anywhere but here. Her slowness in moving,short-term memory loss I don't want to stop living because she is dying....
Some days seem easy, today is not one of them.

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